What the hell happened???? When did dogs take over the world and begin television programming? I went out with friends last night who are mostly dog owners and was informed that there is now a TV station specifically for dogs. Really! It's called DogTV. If you have DirecTV, it is channel 354. I can confirm this because it is currently airing on my television as I type.
Right now it consists of bubbles rushing to the surface of water and underwater bubble sounds. Before this, it was a close up of a lava lamp with classical music. I can't believe that some of you think cat people are crazy. Oh, now they are showing dogs dozing off on the furniture I'm assuming while you are away from home. Way to instill bad habits in your dogs!
The most frightening thing about this, though, is that on the Guide there is a banner that states that this is a free trial from 8/1 - 8/14. From that I assume that this is a premium channel and if your dog gets addicted to it, you'll have to pay extra for a TV channel for your dogs. People, my cats do NOT require premium TV channels. In fact they might be content if the TV was never even turned on. Now they are showing video of a quiet morning in some foreign land and people fishing. By the way, only 6 minutes has gone by since I changed channels to this DogTV and already I have described to you, what? four different doggie viewing experiences that they have aired? Should I draw from this that they must assume that your dogs have remarkably short attention spans???? Doesn't speak too highly of them.
My cats can watch a piece of prey for an hour waiting to see what moves it will make and determining how best to take it down. Of course, sometimes that "prey" is a little red dot from the laser pointer I use to get them moving. But still, they will follow it around as long as my finger can continue to press the "on" button.
I have a friend with whom I go out pretty often. When we leave her house, she leaves her TV on for the dog's entertainment so I'm sure she is loving this channel. In fact she is the one who told me about it yesterday. If I left the TV on in my house when I left, my cats would go to another room to get away from the constant noise.
I like dogs. There have been many times that I wished I could have one. The problem is that I have never really lived in a place suitable for dogs. I don't have a back yard and I don't have the time to devote to walking a dog a couple of times a day since I don't have a yard. Additionally, as it turns out, I am apparently a low maintenance kind of pet person. It didn't dawn on me until today. But an animal that must be taken outside every single time it needs to pee is a problem for me!
Sure, I'll admit that I have people come to feed my cats daily when I am away from home. But if it got down to it, I could leave for a week, set up an automated feeder and waterer and leave them alone and come home to two healthy cats. They'd be a little pissy, but they would still be healthy and all of their waste would be in their litter boxes.
On the other hand, I don't doubt for a minute that if I died in my apartment and it took more than a few hours for someone to find me that Shiner would begin feeding on my fingers by the end of the first day. He's a survivor, what can I say? But you've gotta respect that about him! He doesn't require entertainment or anything else from humans. He'll figure it all out on his own.
So call me a crazy cat lady all you want. At least I'm not paying for premium satellite service for a dog. Who's crazy now?
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