Day Five-Thirty-Five - Talk Like an American Damn It!

Hi peeps!  Yesterday I ended the blog pretty abruptly and I wanted to apologize for that in case any of you got whiplash from the sudden stop.  I was thoroughly enjoying the perfect morning and writing away when I suddenly remembered that I was supposed to meet my friend Mary at 11 a.m. so that we could go to this cooking show at the Dallas Convention Center.  So, I had to hurry up and get dressed and head out.  The cooking show was terrific.  I had a lot of fun and I bought some amazing chefs knives that have to be shipped to me.  I can't wait to get them.

Paula Deen was the headliner for this show.  I've never been much of a Paul Deen fan but I sort of became one yesterday.  Here's my deal.  I have low or no tolerance for people with heavy accents. Okay, if you just entered the country and have a fresh visa or foreign passport, it's ok to have an accent.  If you live in a small rural area and you never leave that area, then it is also ok to have an accent.  But if you have been on national TV, exposed to people without heavy accents on a normal basis and travel all over the country speaking to others who speak normally, wouldn't some of that heavy accent just sort of naturally go away?  I mean, is it just me or does her accent seem to get thicker?

I know people who have lived almost their entire lives in Dallas suburbs and they speak like the just fell off a turnip truck.  If someone asks where you are from and you respond "Play-noe-ah" literally adding syllables to the word, there is something wrong.  Plano is not in the boonies.  The six people who are actually from Plano do not have thick rural Texas accents.  They speak with practically no accent at all.  The other 269,770 people who live in Plano are actually all from some place else.  The majority are from foreign countries.  Several thousand of them are from the northeast, which is sort of a foreign country on it's own.  Many others are from the midwest.  But I can't tell you how often I talk to someone with a thick Texas accent and find out that they are from Carrollton, Lewisville or Farmers Branch.  The thick Texas accent is not a result of listening to others around you speaking that way on a daily basis since most of the people in this part of the Metroplex seem to be from some place other than Texas.

If you sound like Gomer Pyle you are not from Carrollton. But here's my theory.  Those people who have lived most of their lives in whatever North American urban area that they live in and still carry a serious accent do so by choice.  It's their way of standing out, of being an individual.  They are no different than a 16 year old girl dressed in goth clothing or a high school boy with a bright green mohawk.  It is just a cry for attention.  And that's why it bothers me.  Do you want to stand out?  Then do something worthy of garnering some attention!

I am sure that Paula Deen really did grow up in a place where everybody talks like she does.  But she perpetuates the accent.  At this point it has become part of her shtick.  If some blond lady with a gigantic smile walked into a crowded room and just began talking with no accent and cooking shrimp and grits, we probably wouldn't pay much attention.  But when the same blond lady with a crazy thick accent does it, she's recognizable and for some people easy to identify with.  It's endearing on her.

Don't even get me started on the accents of our foreign neighbors to the south.  If your family has lived in Texas for more than one generation, then you need to stop rolling your rrrrrrrrrrrrrr's when you say your name.  We all get that you are Hispanic and proud of that.  The fact that you name is Maria Garcia is sufficient evidence of your heritage.  You do not need to extend the pronunciation of your name by thirty seconds making it Marrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrria Garrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrcia to prove that you are Hispanic.  I get that 37.6% of Texas' population is Hispanic so you are trying to make yourself stand out. But really, it's not necessary.

My worst pet peeve in the world is people who talk completely normally but when they come to one particular word, they feel the need to pronounce the word in a foreign language.  This is Texas people.  We pronounce the word crow-sant.  Don't go getting all uppity and french on us and do that quwaaaaa-sancht thing that makes it sound like you have a french pastry stuck in the back of your throat. When I hear croissant pronounced that way, I get a sudden urge to perform the Heimlich maneuver on the speaker.  It's okay to sound like an American even when you are using a foreign word if you are indeed IN America.

Now, with all this said, I must admit that when I go to East Texas, my accent suddenly becomes thicker. You see, living in Dallas, I make a serious effort to hide my East Texas accent.  But when you are around other people with the same accent, it just creeps out!  I lose all control of my accent as soon as my car crosses the Nacogdoches county line.  The weirdest thing is that I don't necessarily have to go to Nacogdoches for this phenomenon to occur.  If my family members from there come to visit me, it happens also.  So I won't judge anybody if they suddenly start speaking in Wisconsonese when their family comes to visit.  But once they go back home, talk like an American damn it!

Day Five-Thirty-Four - What's in a Name?

Good morning friends!  It's been brought to my attention that I should probably change the name of this blog from Unemployment 101 to anything else since after all, I'm not technically unemployed.  I'm self employed. It makes sense to change the name.  But it just seems like an unnecessary action to take.  If you know me, and most of you do, I don't take unnecessary actions.... EVER!  I barely take necessary actions. Nevertheless, let's kick around this name change idea.

It would be kind of fun to come up with a new name for the personal blog. But I'm not all that creative when it comes to titling things.  I recently finished writing a book and need to distribute a couple of copies to a few friends to preview before I send it off to publishers but after spending a year and a half writing it and sitting on it for the last 2 months, I am totally unable to title the darn thing.  Who would have thought that this would be the most difficult part of writing a book?  I probably just place way too much importance on a title.  But when I'm at Barnes & Noble browsing through the available romances, I look at two things, the title and the picture on the front.  If the title isn't worthy, nothing about the picture will make me even pick up the book to read the jacket or back.  Life is too short to read books with less than clever titles.  I want there to be wit and substance in the books I read even if they are just cheesy romances and the title should reflect that.

It's the same with a blog. Granted, when I came up with Unemployment 101, it was pretty spur of the moment and apparently wasn't the most original title ever.  I think there are several hundred blogs out there with the same title. (But the economy's fine, right Barack?)  It expressed what I needed for it to say.  This blog was originally created as a method of lighting a fire under myself.  On the day I started this, which was day 7 of my unemployment, I had already sat on my couch and read 5 trashy romance novels and done little else.  I needed something to make me accountable.  So I created a blog and each day I posted a task list of the things I needed to accomplish.  I was pretty good at it for a while.  But I have to say that the task list hasn't been updated in months now.  Even when I do post on this blog, I totally forget about it.  Currently, I keep my to do list in a spiral notebook.  The list du jours consists of 13 items that I must complete prior to my cruise night which is now less than 3 weeks away.  As of this moment, two of the 13 items have been marked off of the list.  One was marked off during the day yesterday and then added back on when Zazzle canceled my order because my artwork was incomplete.  It has since been re-done and marked off again. Maybe a good new name for this blog should be Holy CRAP! Who Knew Running a Business Was So Much Work?  A little wordy, right?  But again, it says what I need for it to say....

Most of the items on my to do list really should have already been completed.  But I only came up with the list yesterday.  That was when I realized with the assistance of the receptionist at my vets office that my cruise night is only three weeks away and I still hadn't even completed the order for the snail mail invitations much less addressed them and gotten them in the mail!  Yikes!!!!  You might be relieved to know that this is one of the two things I was able to mark off the list yesterday.  The invitations will be in my hot little hands in less than a week.  Door prizes have also been ordered.  That is the order that Zazzle kicked back.  Beyond that, the venue was settled on a few weeks ago and I am on their calendar.  And I've posted an invite on Facebook that I apparently need to re-post regularly so that people who don't live their lives on FB like a certain travel agent we all know and love does, will see it.  Again, Who Knew It Was This Complicated???  Maybe a good working title would be Complications because really, isn't that what it's all about?

I've been kicking this one around for a few weeks....  tell me what you think....  A Day In The Life of A Stay At Home Cat Mom.  I know!  It's still wordy.  But you have to admit it's clever.  I mean other cat people would be all over that blog.  But they would probably expect daily cat videos and photos.That's a pretty big commitment when you consider that I still have to do all of this travel agent stuff to make a living and someone's got to load cats into carriers and drive them to the vet on a pretty regular basis.  This stuff doesn't do itself!  Besides, that title would really lend itself to the unsubstantiated but spreading rumors that I have become one of those crazy cat ladies and I don't want that.

I think that regardless of the title that I eventually come up with, I'll always keep the day count as part of each individual post.  I like that because it sort of represents the day that everything changed.  I mean 535 days ago, I still worked at the employer who shall not be named and went to work everyday doing a job that I hated. But hey, they paid me pretty good money to do it so it wasn't like I was going to quit or anything. Then it all changed and I've been pretty darn happy for the last 534 days.  Okay, I have to meet a friend in an hour so that we can attend a cooking show together, so we'll get back together soon to figure out this title thing.  If you have suggestions, feel free to share.  But don't get your feelings hurt if I say "uh, NO!"

Day Five-Fourteen - Cats Galore!

Good morning!  It's been so long since I updated this blog!  I'm not ignoring it.  I just haven't had time to post on this one.  I spend most weekday mornings with the other blog. The travel business is busy.  After all, if you want to go anywhere during the holidays this year, now is the time to book those reservations.  Call me....

Since the last time I posted on this blog I have gotten a new kitten.  Her name is Mrs. Beasley.  I was calling her a calico but the vet says that she is a tortie since she has very little to no white hair in her coat. Since he said that I have looked at pictures on the internet and I concur.  I have a tortie.  The first couple of days were pretty touch and go with her.  My two older cats didn't seem too happy to have a new baby sister who plays a LOT.  But things are finally beginning to settle down.

I think the biggest thing that happened to change things was that Shiner went to the vet for a teeth cleaning on Friday and ended up having 6 teeth extracted.  It turns out that he was in a lot of pain that he was not showing. So, he had become a lot less tolerant of everything including hyper little kittens who love to play.  Every time Mrs. Beasley got close to Shiner he hissed and ran away.  This is very out of character for him.  He is usually my very playful cat.  Meanwhile Jingle was making progress everyday getting closer and closer to Mrs. Beasley and even actually chasing her on one occasion Thursday when he lost himself and forgot that he was supposed to resent her.  Since then he has become almost completely comfortable with her and is playing with her this morning!

Shiner is currently heavily drugged but he has still given me reason to hope that things are getting better. His old personality is coming back and this morning Mrs. Beasley has gone up to him several times and they have touched noses.  When that happens he lays calmly as he has been all morning.  When she comes running up to him, he still gets up and moves but never hisses. As long as she is calm, he is tolerant.

Shiner will have to go back to the vet in 6 months since the doctor said he has other bad teeth but they aren't as bad as the ones that were extracted.  Hopefully, we can get the next ones taken care of before they begin to cause him pain.  Shiner got his most recent pain shot yesterday morning.  The vet says it will begin to wear off tomorrow.  So we'll see how he is feeling about Mrs. Beasley as that shot starts to wear off.  When he came home from the vet Friday evening he was very loopy and was apparently hallucinating.  He kept seeing things in the strangest places and was chasing them.  That's what is going on in the photo to the left.  He was certain there was something on that wall and was determined to catch it.  Later in the evening he started acting as though there was something under the couch while I was sitting on it.  He was so insistent that I eventually started thinking what if there really is something under this couch... and I had to get up and move it to inspect. Sure enough nothing was there.

Jingle and Mrs. Beasley have just spent the last thirty minutes chasing one another through the house.  Mrs. Beasley was doing most of the chasing.  But Jingle was a big participant.  So I'm thinking pretty soon I'll have three cats scampering around keeping each other busy and exercised so that I can write blogs and work on trips. This is good news for you guys because I'm going to start digging for some pretty big fall and winter discounts on cruise ships and all inclusive resorts.  You're going to love this.  But while I look, here are a few more photos of Mrs. Beasley to keep you entertained.


Have a happy Labor Day and I'll talk to you all soon!